FREE ENTRY ‘PUB’ NIGHT @ Townhouse 24th April

So who’s up for a FREE ENTRY?? Mid week frolicks!

townhouse swingers

Has your gold fish died? Worried about the size of your penis? Your partner run off with their fuckbuddy? Finding people your nan’s age attractive?? Numb the pain and forget your troubles at The Tipsy Unicorn Bar @ Townhouse. The more you drink, the less you worry!

The Tipsy Unicorn opens its doors at 7pm until 12.30am for anyone to join us for fun, laughs and beer as cold as your ex’s heart! Membership not needed and entry is FREE. Just think of it as a night down at your local pub!! As this is a pub night, wear what you wish!

Why go to your boring local pub to talk about vanilla stuff, when you can come to the Tipsy Unicorn and flirt with other swingers and fetishists and be yourself! If you’re feeling frisky, you can even pay a fiver and venture upstairs to our playrooms or if…

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James Bond 007 Party Night 28th April

You are required to rendezvous at Townhouse on Saturday 28th April for a very special mission. You must be ready for anything… adopt a disguise and be licensed to thrill!

Ensure you are fully equipped with gadgets via ‘Q’, as our guests can be very demanding and you will need your wits about you.

To gain entry, you must say the password ‘Betty Swollocks’; by this your host will know you accept your mission! You may be handed a coded message but it is For Your Eyes Only so keep it safe. To avoid the admission of unwanted civilians, you will be required to verify your identity….you know what to do. The lady on reception is your friend and will take good care of you, tip her well!

It may be unpredictable at times and watch out for Pussy Galore, I hear she is everywhere!! The Man With the Golden Gun is NOT your ally, he has a View to a Kill, so eliminate if apprehended.

The other guests will be wearing smart attire and evening dresses, so it will be hard to differentiate between the sick and twisted villains and the innocent bystanders, so mingle and figure out who is who. Try not to be awkward and draw attention to yourself; dancing with guests will deter suspicious eyes.

Vodka Martinis will be offered (shaken not stirred of course) but they are lethal, so keep a clear head! I hear the buffet is to Live and Let Die for too!

This party is like no other…it is adult in nature and you may be invited into rooms to partake in activities of a sensual nature. Although we understand that this is very tempting, remember that you represent Her Majesty’s Secret Service and debauchery whilst on duty is prohibited, not that this has stopped you before!

This party could take you places you have never been before….but with your ‘weapon’, you will no doubt live to Die Another Day.
Good luck!!!

not so small print…….
Normal prices apply
8.30pm til 3am – last entry 11pm
DJ and Buffet available
New couples and ladies welcome
8 places for guys who must be members
Get your best clobber on!
xxx

*Free Kinky Karaoke with Vicky! Divas @ Townhouse Thursday 12th April

Vicky is looking forward to keeping the seat warm for Jester while he’s taking some time out 🙂 Singing is not compulsory at all but the singing seems to break the ice, making this a heavy play event!!! Can’t wait! xx

townhouse swingers

Being a member of Townhouse has its perks and one of those is a *free monthly karaoke event.

Our regular compere Jester will taking a break for this night, so Vicky will be your karaoke compère and may indulge in a little singing herself. Each karaoke night will have a musical theme and this month we celebrate ‘DIVAS’ those women with the huge voices…the ones that can crack out the songs and fill the stadiums…the ones with the prima donna behaviour and an attitude as large as their voice.

Cher, Mariah, Whitney, Christina, Celine, Aretha, Diana Ross, Donna Summer, Okay, so the female Divas are obvious…. how about the male Divas or Divos?? There are certainly some male performers that have a diva attitude… Elton, Freddie, Robbie Williams etc Just don’t think we will tolerate any diva behaviour at Townhouse 😛

Our karaoke isn’t compulsory although we have plenty of…

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